I can not take away God from my daily life. but I can not take away my humanity either. I am as human as divine every day. Every moment with friends,and family is a remainder that God is with me. Every moment with God is expressed through out the many small encounters with friends during the week. Loving others as I am trying to love myself. It is interesting to hear the words of the Apostle Paul writing to the Jews and Gentiles, who decided to make of all stories of Jesus their own stories in Rome; when he said; “Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle”.
Love from the center of who I am?. I will ask how can I love from my own center if I can not accept who I am. If I lived hidden in the words of acceptance of others. If I had made “religiosity” my own temple. If I have created a life for others to be impressed, so I can be called a successful man or woman. Love from the center means that first I have to love myself. Do I really know who I am? “You know,I could do so many stuff to be good, I could go and pray all day so I could feel closer to god, I could read all holly books, repeat all anointing prayers, and sing only songs for my god. I can show the world that I am a godly man but still not having a good heart and mind. Then everything I do is just an empty sound. It is just a whisper. This is exactly what uncomplicated spirituality has been all about, finding my true self in the midst of my imperfections so it is not just an empty sound or quite whisper; but a loud cry to be real, vulnerable and open to others.”(Uncomplicated Spirituality)
Love from the center of who I am means that I need to accept the ugliness in me, the things I do not like about me, fear, doubt, insecurity; but at the same it is also to love the wonderful beauty inside of me, and to realize that my daily life is a continuous interaction of the goodness and evil in me.
Love from the center of who I am starts with loving me. There is a word I have been using a lot this week; I believe is a word that we have misunderstood many ways and sometimes is used to blame others. I also think that is very little used in ourselves. Its meanings is the courteous regard for people’s feelings, an attitude of admiration and esteem, the condition of being honored. So going back to my question, How can I love myself? It will be through out a simple word: Respect. The moment I treat myself respecting my own feelings, when I can admire who I am not from what others say about me, but simple because I am valuable and unique. When I can say I am a person who has honor. In this moment there is this flow of knowing I am someone who has worth. Some people will find this worth through out religion, their jobs, or even studies; I have found it through my God and by the many writings I have done for the last 4 years. When I respect myself, there is no way I can not respect others. When I love myself, there is no way I can not love from the center of myself. This is a big challenge and I know It is not fulfilled yet, but I am working on it.
“If I despised myself, It would be no compensation if everyone saluted me, and if I respect myself, it does not trouble me if others hold me lightly” Max Nordau